Just for Today

Just for today, I will not worry.

Just for today, I will not be angry.

Just for today, I will do my work earnestly and diligently.

Just for today, I will live in gratitude.

Photos by Brynna Bryant of Respiro Photography.

Just for today, I will be kind to every other living thing.

Namaste.

Note: these are the Japanese Usui Reiki principles that I practice and try to incorporate into my daily life. Aren't they such beautiful reminders to live in the moment? :)

On Weariness

Photos by Brynna Bryant of Respiro Photography.

I haven't blogged in two weeks. 

I find it challenging to break the silence after a long gap, and I'm also not a big fan of reading posts where the blogger makes a bunch of apologies right off the bat, so I'm just going to jump right in.

Welcome, 2016!

Did you guys have a good holiday season? Are you gearing up for any exciting changes this year? I've missed writing to you and I'm grateful to be back to Alive in the Fire.

I'll admit that I'm relieved the holidays are over. 

I had high hopes that this first week of the new year would be more relaxing and fun... and here I am sitting on the couch fighting off a flu bug that has kicked my ass for the last 24 hours. Something about being in such a vulnerable state -- feeling worse than I have in years from being sick -- gave me the inspiration to write.

I'll be honest: I feel weary.

I keep thinking about how valuable my health is. How important it is to find balance. And how I have an ongoing struggle with feeling like I need to do more to be 'enough.'

I was in horrible pain last night, giving myself a Reiki treatment and texting with my healer about where to focus the energy. She said she could tell I was being energetically drained near my second and third chakras, and it was related to trying to do too much, having a lack of boundaries, and releasing expectations of what others expect from me.

I started sobbing.

I know this about myself -- that I struggle with perfectionism and a habit of taking on more than I can handle. And yet it seems like every year it pops up and bites me in the ass again.

I believe things happen for a reason and at the time that they're needed. Maybe I'm sitting here with my electrolyte water and chicken soup, being reminded of how important it is to take care of myself, because that's where I need my focus to be this year.

What if 2016 could be my year for truly embracing my own healing? For finding a sense of grace and ease and being OK with saying no, and not trying to handle it all?

I've already had a sense in the last few weeks that I need to scale back my yoga teaching schedule.

I need to create more down time for myself, when I'm not holding space or taking care of anyone.

I could use more massages, Reiki treatments, haircut appointments (which I find to be the most relaxing thing), and pedicures.

More time sitting in silence in the sunshine. Less time checking my phone and running around to different places all day. More time writing, meditating, and singing my mantras.

I'm not sure how to make this shift, but I do know I'll need support along the way. I want to practice what I teach, what I often say to students in class: be kind to yourself!

So thank you in advance for giving me that support. Simply by reading this, you're doing so.

And, in other news, I'll have some exciting updates about Sponsored Yogis 2016 coming soon to the blog. Stay tuned.

And thanks, as always, for being here. Namaste.

Awaken

Do you ever feel like you're moving through life like a zombie?

Time passes, but it feels like things are out of your control. You watch the days fly by without a sense of knowing what you want, or what you can do to feel happier, healthier and more present.

If you've ever wanted to feel more AWAKE and ALIVE, I invite you to attend my upcoming workshop (details below). Or, if you're not local to Sacramento, stay tuned for some free downloadable content on this same topic.

I want to help you wake up -- to see yourself as you truly are, to awaken your highest potential, and to move forward!

Can't attend the workshop, but you read Alive in the Fire regularly and want to learn more about how to AWAKEN through yoga, Reiki and journaling? Send me an email at aliveinthefire at gmail dot com. First three readers to contact me will receive a free prize. Please use the subject line "AWAKEN" :)

Awaken: A Yoga, Reiki and Journaling Workshop with Rachel Koontz

Saturday, Dec 12th

12-2pm @ Saha Yoga and Wellness Center

5931 Stanley Avenue Ste 7, Carmichael Ca, 95608

$30

Bring your journal (or purchase one for $15)

Happy, healthy beings of light... that's what we are. We all deserve love, goodness, happiness, and abundance. But we don't always feel that way. We get stuck, we have fears, we have setbacks, and we get discouraged. My goal is to help reawaken your zest for life and give you some simple tools for staying attentive and peaceful.

PS, in case you missed it earlier in the post: Can't attend the workshop, but you read Alive in the Fire regularly and want to learn more about how to AWAKEN through yoga, Reiki and journaling? Send me an email at aliveinthefire at gmail dot com. First three readers to contact me will receive a free prize. Please use the subject line "AWAKEN" :)

Namaste.

Reiki Energy

Photos by Brynna Bryant of Respiro Photography.

Every moment has energy. Every breath. Every movement.

The question is, what do you surround yourself with?

What toxic and draining energies do you come into contact with? And what are your practices for healing, release and renewal?

I'm so grateful for my Reiki practice in that it allows me to channel healing. To find that 'reset' button, energetically. To give myself that gift, and to share it with others.

Drained batteries. Exhaustion. Depletion.

Reiki remedies these, and it creates opportunities for us to reach our highest potential.

I'm currently working on manifesting more Reiki -- sharing it more with those that I know, whether through one-on-one treatments, distance healing, or retreats that incorporate yoga and Reiki. If you're curious to hear more, please reach out (aliveinthefire at gmail dot com).

Sending peaceful energy your way, dear reader!

Namaste.

Yoga and Reiki

Have you ever tried Reiki? It is a powerful healing practice that cleanses the body, purifies the mind, nourishes the spirit, and allows us to tune in to our higher self.

I could not be more excited and grateful to offer a combination of Reiki and yoga when I teach.

I've been giving treatments and I'm stunned by how powerful the work can be -- it has such a big impact! Whether you're new to energy work or familiar with it, whether you're generally happy and healthy or you're suffering from a physical ailment or an emotional struggle, Reiki is amazing!

It always lifts my spirits and helps me get through rough times. Even lately, with the little ups and downs of shifting to a new schedule and the feelings of doubt and fear that sometimes show up, Reiki makes a huge difference in helping me get through long days.

I've also been sending Reiki to all of my yoga students at the end of class. Generally I'll sit at the front of the room during Shavasana, just meditating. Sometimes I will direct the flow of Reiki to a student if he or she seems sad or down or depleted, and I'll notice relaxation come over their body.

I also meditate on Reiki being present in my hands before class, so that any hands-on adjustments I do will be even more helpful to the yogis in the room.

Sending distance Reiki is so powerful, too! I have a lot of friends around the country, and I'll often send energy healing to them throughout my day-- if I'm waiting in line somewhere, or shooting a text message to them, or even waiting at a red light in my car.

Reiki has unlimited potential to help others heal! I love it so much. :)

If you're looking for more information about what Reiki is and what it does, please check out my new website, www.aliveinthefirereiki.com. I'm offering treatments locally in Sacramento and Roseville, and I'm so happy to share it with others. You can always email me at aliveinthefire at gmail dot com for more details, too.

Namaste, loves!

I Was Made to Be Real, Not Perfect

 Photos by Justin Kral of Kral Studios.

Knowing myself is a delicate art, an ongoing practice.

I reach moments of clarity. “I’ve got this,” I think. “I know what I want, and I’m on the path I’m meant to be on.” Or, “I have what I want, and I’m grateful for it.” In my relationships, my work, my willingness to try new things, my habits that keep me healthy, my ability to be a good friend, or to teach a good yoga class.

I’ve got my shit together, I’ll tell myself. I’m tending to my needs, acknowledging my feelings. Speaking my truth.

And then I am woken up.

I start to hear the question beneath the chatter, the one that’s always asking, Am I good enough?

When I stop checking my phone for notifications, or rushing through a meal, or helping someone else instead of taking time for me…over-booking my calendar and racing from thing to thing—when I slow down, and take notice, there’s sometimes still this emptiness that I haven’t tended to. It’s been sitting there and growing darker and deeper, wanting to be acknowledged.

This week my awareness shifted while I was lying on the massage table, receiving Reiki. It was perhaps the first time I had been fully relaxed in several weeks. Suddenly I became overwhelmed by a feeling of fear, and a sense of deep vulnerability. My healer had noticed a lot of heat and inflammation in my low back and hip, where my sciatica has been flaring up. “You’re shivering,” she said, “almost like your body has been through a shock.”

And I could feel it – the vibration of pain, the way it’s been present in my body, left unnoticed.

Well, not entirely unnoticed. Lately I’ve been pretty conscious of the physical pain – whether I’m having an easy day with no sciatica, or a day with pain. Sitting is uncomfortable, driving is worse, and swimming didn’t help, but frog pose did. Stretching out felt good, and so did relaxing after I got home from work, but as soon as I pushed too hard, the discomfort returned.

Hit or miss is what it feels like. The realization is this: the hip openers are a start, but they are not enough.  

The miss is that I haven’t been addressing the emotional and spiritual aspect of the healing I need. The darkness and the shadows I’m still carrying around. The pain of loss that I haven’t fully grieved and the worry about a future I’m uncertain about. There’s a lot I need to – and am ready to – let go of. There’s a lot I want to say. I’m allowed to raise my voice, and say those things.

I am standing now in awareness, seeing how I can start with pigeon pose, but at some point the practice is really about learning to love myself.

And on this healing path, I’ll slowly begin to shed the deep, false fear that I’m not worth it. I acknowledge the way I crave closeness but am afraid of closeness. The way I feel separated and don’t want others to notice me, when really I yearn for intimacy and desire to love—and be loved—unconditionally. I see that in reality, I deserve the spotlight and I’m not a selfish person for stepping into it from time to time.

And I’ll remind myself that these feelings are not so different from those around me, that my struggles are not experienced alone.

None of us are alone, and our bodies hold wisdom. My body is telling me things all the time, whether I’m listening or not. Thankfully, this week I was woken up to my body shivering, saying, all at once: I’ve been missing you and you are OK, you always have been.

My healer said something to me that resonated to my core, to my very root chakra, the one that needs healing. She said:

You are the most important person you know.

There’s something very empowering about putting yourself first, about being willing to do the important work of healing.

I was made to be real, not perfect. I will walk this path of healing now. Let me be strong on the days when I’m stumbling. Let the dust be dusted off, so that the light can shine through.

Radiant

I feel joyful today. I spent last night dancing, and it was just what I needed... releasing what does not serve me, laughing, watching people let loose, smiling at the way we all feel the same happiness.

Today I had a reiki/massage session with my healer. I hula hooped in the park. I took a restful nap. And now I'm sitting at the patio of my favorite cafe, enjoying a coffee and sandwich and the way the sunlight feels.

Days like today, I feel radiant with gratitude.

As I walked in to order my coffee, I had this vision of myself sitting on a patio somewhere in Europe, listening to the sea as it moves, the sound of Spanish being spoken. I could picture what it would feel like to open my laptop among strangers, sitting down to do the same thing I'm doing now in a place that is unfamiliar and beautiful.

Walking cobblestone streets, in and out of cathedrals. Being barefoot on the hardwood floor of a new yoga studio, bowing namaste to a teacher whose accent makes me smile. Eating food I've never tried, giving hugs to people I've never met, gathering experiences I will never forget.

Life is beautiful, and precious. On days like today, I love all of it. May I continue to be a blessing to those I meet, and may I continue to travel freely, riding the breeze that is this human experience.

Namaste.