“I don’t sleep,” he says, shaking his head.

“Not at all?”

My eyes widen. “Not for the whole 48 hour shift?”

He explains how he lays down in bed and tries to be still and focuses on his breathing. “But it’s not really sleep,” he says. “I’m actually excited when there’s another call so I can get up and go do something.”

I nod. We hear the tones drop.

When we ride in the truck, I notice how quickly they are ‘on.’

It only takes a few seconds for them to be on the radio, talking through all the details of this call. I fumble with my headset, realizing it is too loose to stay put on my head.

The firefighter next to me pulls out a laminated map. He pores over the layout of the mobile home park that we’re turning in to, counting the homes. “I think this is right near the one we went to last time,” he says.

“We’ve got a pointer,” the engineer says, nodding toward the man standing in the street who is flagging us down.

I slide to the edge of my seat as we go around a corner.

Here I am, just working on holding on, and they already know exactly where to go.

The man who has fallen is laying on the couch in pain.

The youngest firefighter goes straight to him, asking him about what happened.

I notice his posture, how he holds confidence. He speaks directly and clearly. There is no hesitation in the way he works.

Later, after the paramedics arrive and they are moving him to the ambulance, I notice the body mechanics of the firefighter when he squats down to lift him up. His spine is straight and the knee/ankle alignment is perfect.

Squats, I tell myself. Practice squats and then drill them in class.

A small moment of inspiration, seeing how my world fits in with theirs.

We’re standing in the sunlight talking about the rigs. He shows me the differences, explaining which ones are used for what. He explains how the hazmat vehicle doesn’t have water on it. “It’s basically just a big toolbox,” he tells me, smiling.

I smile too. I listen, noticing the faint purple under his eyelids. He seems so young to have dark circles under his eyes, I think.

Last year in September, I completed a teacher training with Yoga for First Responders (YFFR), a nonprofit whose mission is to support firefighters, law enforcement officers, emergency medical personnel, and dispatchers who deal with high levels of stress. Through job-specific and culturally-informed yoga classes, Yoga for First Responders helps those who need it most build mental, physical and emotional resilience.

As a follow up to the week-long training, YFFR teachers are encouraged to do ride-alongs with local fire and police departments, jail tours, and/or sit with dispatchers during a shift.

This week, I spent time with my local fire department.

I arrived feeling nervous and was quickly put at ease after being introduced to the three firefighters on duty. They were easy to talk to, friendly, and very open-minded about yoga. I spent the majority of the time at the fire house, learning about the equipment and getting a glimpse into their experiences, skills, and career paths; one has 1 year of experience, one has 11 years, and one has over 25 years on the job.

Even in our short time together, I experienced a huge shift in perspective and appreciation for what firefighters do, and the sacrifices they make. I learned about how community politics and local economic concerns impact the work, I experienced the rush of responding to a call, and I witnessed how hyper-vigilance (always being ‘on’ while in the field) can take its toll. I heard stories about being on the job for 21 days during the Camp Fire, and how that experience made the Carr Fire seem ‘like nothing’ in comparison. I heard about trainings related to incident command, terrorism, sex trafficking, and bombs, and was impressed by the knowledge, intelligence, and enthusiasm within the group.

The firefighters I met obviously take great pride in their work, and they’ve worked extremely hard to get where they are. I’m inspired by their commitment and their dedication, and so grateful to be a part of the work being done by Yoga for First Responders.

Sharing yoga classes feels like the least I can do to provide support, but it is a simple, effective way to give back— and so I’ll start there.

To learn more about Yoga for First Responders, visit their website or Facebook page, or read my posts about deciding to do the training, Day 1 in Pflugerville, Texas, Day 2 of training, and how YFFR taught me how to build resilience into my yoga practice.

PS Please consider donating to Yoga for First Responders here. Every donation counts!

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