Questions

There is this deep part of me that questions... everything.

All the bits and pieces of my life.

I hear the questions, quietly in my mind. 

Is this what I'm supposed to be doing?

Where do I want to go from here?

Can I accept this moment, as it is?

Can I love myself, as I am? 

  

Today I can choose to set those questions aside and simply breathe.

Simply be.

Images in this post by Ken Johnson of CKCImage.com. Leggings by Ginger Orange.

Yoga is a Practice

Here are a few things that I know, in this moment.

Yoga is a practice.

And my practice is in a constant state of flux, just like me.

Postures will come and go.

Inversions? Fancy transitions? They do not define me.

Today I practiced yoga for the first time in a week, and my body felt stiff and tight. My joints ached. I tried for binds in Goddess pose and Extended Side Angle, and felt as though I was in a different body than my own.

I felt uncomfortable. I kept going. And in savasana, I felt relieved and a little proud of myself for sticking through the discomfort.

I've heard other teachers and students talk about 'taking a break' from their practice. It has been years since I've done that with mine, but in the last few months there have been moments when I'd rather do anything than yoga.

I know I've spent a lot of time comparing myself to other yogis, teachers and students, deciding who has a 'stronger' practice, who knows more, who is capable, who is worthy.

I'd love to let all of that go.

I journaled about it today, actually. How I'm tired of letting my practice define me, rather than support me.

I don't live to do yoga; I do yoga in order to live a more balanced, happy, peaceful life.

Let that be my mantra. Let the comparisons and judgments fall away.

I want to be remembered as a yogi who loved wholeheartedly.

I want to be remembered as someone who cared, who took care of herself with grace and kindness, and who refused to let fear get the best of her. If handstand is in that picture, OK. If not, OK.

How do you practice ahimsa in your yoga routine? How do you let go of a fear of failure, of not being good enough?

The Gift of This Moment

Consider for a moment the gifts contained by the present.

This breath.

This place you are in.

When you turn toward the present moment, you find that it contains everything you need. Everything that you are is right here.

Stay open. Stay willing.

Photos by Felipe Silva of @the_lost_portraits (1, 2) and by Jobi Otso (3).

Stay True

Photos by Tom Huynh Photography.

Give yourself permission to be unsteady and uncertain. Remember that you're doing the best you can with what resources you have.

Don't discount all the effort you're putting in. It is incredible, the way you keep moving forward in spite of the setbacks and challenges. 

Stay true to yourself. 

Yoga Photos to Document Your Progress

Do you guys ever take photos to document your progress in a yoga pose?

With the popularity of Instagram and Facebook, it's pretty common to see pictures of people doing yoga. And while it's fun and uplifting to post a yoga pic on your social media page, and hear encouraging comments from friends, it can also be a powerful tool for deepening your personal practice.

 Above photo by Cait Loper. Below photo by Felipe Silva of @the_lost_portraits.

I recommend committing to a pose for a period of time, maybe 6 months or a year. Put a sticky note on your wall to remind you to do the pose every day. Take a photo each month to track your progress. Consider taking time to write about this pose-- how it makes you feel, what it offers you, what other poses it gives you access to.

If you're a yoga teacher, you might even consider investing in a professional photo shoot twice this year, and see how far you've come.

You'll be surprised by what you learn when you look at your alignment at a distance, and how quickly you progress in the posture!

 Above photo by Cait Loper

A few more tips on how taking photos can help inspire your practice:

• Consider trying a new studio once a month. Explore your local yoga communities. Get a photo in front of the space or in the lobby with your teacher after class, or ask a new friend that you meet to take a quick picture of you after class on your mat. Use the photo opportunity as a way to connect with new yogis, inspire your conversation, and maybe even make a new friend that you'll cherish for years to come!

• Be cognizant of studio etiquette. Often our yoga studio rooms are sacred space where we ask people not to bring their cell phones. If you are going to take a photo, ask your teacher before or after class if they're OK with it (chances are, they'll be happy you checked in, and more than willing to take the picture for you!)

• Ask yourself the question, What poses am I hungry for? Are there any poses you generally tend to hate, that you're ready to try again? Is there an arm balance or an inversion that you want to master? Once you are willing to commit to practicing the pose on a regular basis - every day, or maybe up to 5 times a week - you'll see incredible progress. Be kind to yourself in the process, and stay devoted!

• After you take a photo, take time to notice your body alignment in the pose. Notice lines of energy. Where is the action of the pose? Where are your feet and hands? Is there anywhere in your body that energy seems 'stuck'? Are you holding your breath or scrunching up the muscles in your face? What do you notice? Often these little details will help you unlock new understanding of the pose, increase your knowledge of human anatomy, or find a new trick that helps you.

Here are my reflections on my progress in King Pigeon (Mermaid Pose):

• Today my hips are more open and closer to the ground
• Today my chest and shoulders are more open and heart chakra is more able to give and receive love 
• In the left picture, I was a teacher in training; on the right, I'm a full time teacher prepping for a consciously sequenced class to get students into this pose
• Then: more hair :)
• Now: more tattoos
• Always: grateful for my yoga practice! 

I'm amazed, humbled and proud of how far I've come in two years, not only with some of these fancy poses but moreso with how I am able to carry my practice off the mat -- to be able to care for and love myself unconditionally, for my willingness to get out of my comfort zone and be vulnerable, and for using my voice!

PS My absolute favorite Instagram account to follow if you're looking for progress photos is @cyogalab. Carmen Aguilar has an incredible asana practice, and it's because she's devoted to working on the poses every day. Check out her page for ideas about how to deepen your poses, and stay committed to your physical practice.

Rumi

Photo by Two Twenty Photos.

There is a desert

I long to be walking,

a wide emptiness,

peace beyond any

understanding of it.

- poem by Rumi from Mala of the Heart